Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Essay on Relocating Businesses: Grammar & Clarity Issues
Sample Answer with Feedback

πŸ“… Published Apr 2026 ⏱️ 40 minutes recommended πŸ“ 418 words Β· Band 5.5
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This Band 5.5 IELTS essay explores the topic of relocating businesses to address urban issues. While it presents a relevant opinion, it suffers from grammatical errors and clarity issues. Improving these aspects could enhance the overall effectiveness of the argument.

IELTS Writing Task 2 Question

Agree/ Disagree (Opinion) Β· Urban Planning Β· 40 min


Relocating big businesses and industries and their workers from urban areas to rural areas could be a good solution for the issues of traffic congestion and housing in major cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Write at least 250 words.
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5.5 Band

Overall Band Score

418 words · Agree/ Disagree (Opinion) Β· AI Evaluated

6
Task Response
5.5
Coherence
5.5
Lexical Resource
5
Grammar

Score Breakdown

IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)

Task Response
6
Coherence and Cohesion
5.5
Lexical Resource
5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
5

Summary: The essay meets the 250-word minimum and addresses the topic, presenting a partially agreed position. However, it suffers from frequent grammatical errors, limited lexical range, and some clarity issues. The argument is developed but lacks depth and contains minor irrelevancies. Cohesion is adequate but compromised by awkward transitions. Overall, a band 5.5 is appropriate.

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Student Answer
Real submission β€’ 418 words β€’ Annotated
418 words Band 5.5 WritingPart2
● Spelling ● Grammar ● Vocabulary

Large scale businesses and industrial companies often provide employment opportunities to a lot of individuals in both urban and rural areas, However, the location is often debatable. It is believed that moving large scale businesses and industrial facilities and their employees from big cities to an urban environment could result in less traffic congestion and reduced accommodation issues and I to some extent agree to this narrative. This essay will expatiate on the reasons why to both options might be appealing to some members of the public and clearly state my opinion.
Firstly, Urban areas are highly populated and there are less Lands for building industries. People believe that there are a lot of business opportunities in big cities and this is leading to high level of relocation every now and then, this is resulting i over crowding and accommodation issues. Beyond relocation, Landlords seeing a high demand in renting houses, they use this as a yardstick to increase house rent prices. Consider in abuja for example, houses are being significantly increased evry year, my apartment price moved from two million to four million naira annually and if I go i search of a new place I may just encounter a higher price due to agent fees and other miscellaneous.
On the other hand, If large scale businesses and industrial facilities are brought down to rural areas, there would be less likelihood of people relocating in large numbers. Due to the fact that rural areas are not as big as urban cities, these businesses will have close proximity to where people already live, some might even walk down to work. Furthermore, there would be a significant reduction in crime rates and touts due to increased employment opportunities.
From my own perspective, big cities have a lot of large scale business and industries and relocating a few can prove beneficial. There is less likelihood of people being under a lot of pressure to move from rural areas in search of greener pastures if these opportunities are brought to them. If the amount of industries are reduced in cities, we will have less air pollution too that was caused by both thier waste products and a lot of cars plying the roads daily.
In conclusion, it is a pleasant idea to relocate some large scale businesses and industrial facilities to rural area and this can greatly solve employment issues, traffic issues and accommodation problems. Besides, who wouldnt want thier home town to develop more? this is how big cities started.

AI Feedback Report Details

Spelling Β· Grammar Β· Vocabulary Β· Criteria Analysis

Spelling Mistakes

5 errors
Misspelled Word Corrected Word
evry every
i (in 'resulting i over crowding') in
abuja Abuja
thier their
wouldnt wouldn't

Grammatical Mistakes

14 errors
Mistake Correction Explanation
areas, However areas. However Comma splice; should separate sentences with a period or use a semicolon
agree to this narrative agree with this narrative Collocation: 'agree with' is used for opinions, 'agree to' for proposals
why to both options why both options Unnecessary preposition 'to' after 'why'
there are less Lands there is less land Subject-verb agreement and uncountable noun: 'land' is singular, use 'is less land'
Landlords seeing a high demand, they use Landlords, seeing high demand, use Dangling participle; restructure for clarity
houses are being significantly increased evry year house prices increase significantly every year Awkward passive; better active voice and correct verb 'increase'
my apartment price moved from two million to four million naira the rent on my apartment increased from two million to four million naira Unclear pricing; 'apartment price' is ambiguous; 'rent' is more precise
if I go i search of a new place if I go in search of a new place Missing preposition 'in'
large scale business and industries large-scale businesses and industries Hyphenation needed for compound adjective; plural 'businesses' required
the amount of industries are reduced the number of industries is reduced Countable noun 'industries' requires 'number'; subject-verb agreement with 'number is'
that was caused by both thier waste products that is caused by both their waste products Tense consistency: use present tense for ongoing effect
to rural area to rural areas Plural noun needed for general reference
who wouldnt want thier home town who wouldn't want their hometown Contraction and spelling; 'hometown' as one word
this is how big cities started This is how big cities started Capitalize start of sentence after question mark

Vocabulary Improvements

6 suggestions
Original Word/Phrase Improved Word/Phrase Explanation
a lot of (multiple instances) many / numerous Informal; use more precise quantifiers in academic writing
yardstick benchmark / criterion Informal metaphor; better suited for academic context
touts street vendors / informal traders Informal; use more neutral or specific term
greener pastures better opportunities Cliché; replace with direct expression
pleasant idea viable solution / sound proposal Too informal; use more academic phrasing
every now and then frequently / continuously Informal idiom; use more precise adverb

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Detailed Criteria Feedback

AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion

Task Response 6
Evaluation
The essay responds to the prompt and expresses a clear opinion (partial agreement). It provides reasons and a specific example (rent increase in Abuja). However, the argument is somewhat superficial; ideas like crime reduction and pollution are mentioned but not fully explored. The position is maintained throughout.
Examples
The example of apartment rent increasing from two million to four million naira is concrete but personal. The discussion of rural proximity and walking to work is relevant but underdeveloped.
How to Improve
Deepen the analysis by considering counterarguments or broader implications. Use more general, researched examples rather than personal anecdotes. Ensure each paragraph directly supports the thesis.
Coherence and Cohesion 5.5
Evaluation
There is a basic essay structure (intro, body paragraphs, conclusion). Cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' are used. However, the flow is sometimes disjointed; ideas jump from rent to crime rates without clear linking. Paragraphing could be more logical.
Examples
The second body paragraph starts with 'On the other hand' but then discusses rural benefits, which is fine, but the shift to crime rates feels abrupt. The third paragraph begins with 'From my own perspective' but repeats earlier points rather than adding new analysis.
How to Improve
Use clearer topic sentences and signposting. Ensure each paragraph has one main idea with supporting details. Link sentences more smoothly with connectors like 'consequently', 'furthermore', or 'as a result'.
Lexical Resource 5.5
Evaluation
The vocabulary is generally simple and repetitive ('large scale businesses', 'industries', 'relocating'). There are several spelling errors ('evry', 'thier', 'touts', 'expatiate', 'yardstick'). Some attempts at less common words ('miscellaneous', 'proximity') are present but not always accurate.
Examples
Uses 'expatiate' (likely meant 'elaborate') and 'yardstick' (acceptable but informal). 'Touts' is unclear in context. Spelling mistakes like 'evry' and 'thier' lower the lexical score.
How to Improve
Expand vocabulary by learning synonyms for common terms (e.g., 'relocation', 'congestion', 'accommodation'). Proofread carefully to eliminate spelling errors. Use a dictionary to confirm word meaning and collocation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy 5
Evaluation
There are frequent grammatical errors: missing articles ('less Lands'), incorrect prepositions ('resulting i over crowding'), subject-verb agreement issues ('houses are being significantly increased'), and punctuation problems. Some sentences are run-ons or incomplete.
Examples
'I to some extent agree to this narrative' (missing verb 'do' or rephrase). 'Consider in abuja for example' lacks a verb. 'who wouldnt want thier home town to develop more?' lacks subject and has contraction spelling error.
How to Improve
Review basic grammar rules: article usage, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. Practice writing complex sentences with correct punctuation. Consider using shorter, clearer sentences to avoid errors.
πŸ’‘
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.

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