This band 5.5 IELTS writing task 2 opinion essay addresses video games but falls short in organization and vocabulary usage. While it discusses both benefits and drawbacks, the lack of clear structure and limited vocabulary hinder the overall effectiveness. Understanding these aspects can help improve your own essay writing.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Agree/ Disagree (Opinion) · Video games · 40 min
Video games are seen by some as a harmless form of entertainment, or even a useful way to learn new skills. However, others argue that video games have a negative impact on the people who play them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits?
Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)
Summary: The essay addresses the topic and presents both benefits and drawbacks of video games. However, it lacks clear structure, uses limited vocabulary, and contains several grammatical errors. The response would benefit from better organization and language use.
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this is good question in the world now. becouse all children playing different games. such us when people were play games he feeled relax and avoid to stress. I prefare games than anything else. A lot of games improves people's reaction. Games are currently being promoted worldwide now.There are even tournaments being held for the games.This could be useful for today's youth if they use it in the right way. But we must not forget real life, everything should be in moderation because it can cause a lot of harm.I also play games in my spare time, sometimes I spend a lot of time on it, but I try to do everything in moderation.On the one hand, video games can provide several positive effects. First of all, they can improve cognitive skills such as problem-solving, decision-making, and hand-eye coordination. Many games require players to think quickly, plan strategies, and react under pressure. In addition, some educational games help children learn languages, mathematics, or history in a more enjoyable way. Video games can also be a source of relaxation after a stressful day and may help people connect with friends online, especially in multiplayer games.In conclusion, while video games can help people develop certain skills and provide entertainment, the negative consequences are often more significant. Addiction, health issues, and social isolation are serious problems that can affect both children and adults. Therefore, I believe that the drawbacks of video games outweigh their benefits, especially when people fail to control the amount of time they spend playing them.
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling · Grammar · Vocabulary · Criteria Analysis
Spelling Mistakes
3 errors| Misspelled Word | Corrected Word |
|---|---|
| becouse | because |
| prefare | prefer |
| feeled | felt |
Grammatical Mistakes
4 errors| Mistake | Correction | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| this is good question | this is a good question | Article use: 'a' is required before a singular noun. |
| such us | such as | Incorrect phrase: 'such us' should be 'such as' to introduce examples. |
| were play games | were playing games | Tense consistency: 'playing' should be in the past continuous tense to match 'were'. |
| avoid to stress | avoid stress | Incorrect verb form: 'avoid' should be followed by a noun or gerund ('avoiding stress'). |
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Detailed Criteria Feedback
AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion
Task Response6
Evaluation
The essay addresses the task and provides a clear position; it discusses both benefits and drawbacks of video games.
Examples
The essay mentions cognitive skill improvement and relaxation as benefits and highlights addiction as a drawback.
How to Improve
Expand on the arguments with more examples and ensure a balanced discussion.
Coherence & Cohesion5.5
Evaluation
The essay lacks a clear structure, with ideas not logically sequenced and some abrupt transitions between points.
Examples
The transition between discussing personal experience and general benefits is abrupt.
How to Improve
Organize ideas into clear paragraphs with topic sentences and use cohesive devices to link ideas smoothly.
Lexical Resource5.5
Evaluation
The vocabulary is understandable but limited, with some repetition and incorrect word forms.
Examples
Words like 'becouse', 'prefare', and phrases like 'such us' are incorrectly used.
How to Improve
Expand vocabulary range and check for correct usage and spelling.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy5
Evaluation
The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, affecting comprehensibility.
Examples
Errors include incorrect verb forms ('were play'), missing articles ('a good question'), and sentence fragments.
How to Improve
Focus on sentence structure and grammar rules, practicing with complex sentences and reviewing grammar fundamentals.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
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