Achieving a Band 5 in the IELTS Writing Task 2 requires addressing clarity and vocabulary issues. This essay discusses video games, arguing that their drawbacks outweigh benefits. However, you'll find that repetitive arguments and limited vocabulary impact the overall quality. Explore how to enhance your writing skills based on this evaluation.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Agree/ Disagree (Opinion) · Video games · 40 min
Video games are seen by some as a harmless form of entertainment, or even a useful way to learn new skills. However, others argue that video games have a negative impact on the people who play them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits?
Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)
Summary: The essay meets the minimum word count (305 words) and addresses the topic directly, arguing that drawbacks outweigh benefits. However, ideas are underdeveloped with repetitive arguments, structure is basic, vocabulary is limited, and grammatical errors reduce clarity. Scores reflect a competent but limited response.
Now write your own — and see how your verdict holds up.
Submit your Video games essay and receive AI scores across Task Response, Coherence, Lexical Resource, and Grammar — plus a Band 9 model answer for your exact question.
Some people argue that video games are a hazardous form of entertainment, which has a negative impact on human health and growth. On the other hand, in some people's point of view, individuals learn new skills in a safe environment.
Well, from my perspective, video games have a hazardous form of entertainment. Individuals who play online games on computers have a bad effect on their body growth and mental health. Because for people who play outdoor games, their metabolism is increased, and individuals feel hungry and then eat healthy food, which helps in their body growth. People gain confidence and decision-making capability on the sports ground. These abilities help in the future to make decisions in work life.
On the positive aspect of video games, these give education and entertainment at the same time. Video games enhanced the motor activity of humans; people can immerse themselves in virtual worlds that are often more appealing and stimulating than reality. Video games can also foster concentration and creativity as well as logical thinking and imagination skills, which helps them in the future.
But from my perspective, the negative impact of video games outweighs the benefits.
Because children are more addicted to these video games, and they spend many hours on computers or mobile phones to play video games. They do not know how these games badly affect their body growth. I think creativity, concentration, and other skills that are developed by video games are also developed by outdoor games. Outdoor games enhanced patience in children, and children learned how they act at the right time. Outdoor games developed human personality and body language.
In conclusion, outdoor games have more positive effects than video games. Individuals learn much more of those skills in outdoor games as compared to indoor (video) games. So, I prefer to do outdoor games.
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling · Grammar · Vocabulary · Criteria Analysis
Grammatical Mistakes
7 errors| Mistake | Correction | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| video games have a hazardous form of entertainment | video games are a hazardous form of entertainment | Incorrect verb usage; 'have' should be 'are' to describe the nature of video games |
| Because for people who play outdoor games, their metabolism is increased | This is because people who play outdoor games have increased metabolism | Sentence fragment; avoid starting sentences with 'Because' in formal writing |
| Video games enhanced the motor activity of humans | Video games enhance the motor skills of humans | Verb tense error; use present tense for general statements |
| which helps them in the future | which help them in the future | Subject-verb agreement; 'skills' is plural, so 'help' is correct |
| Outdoor games enhanced patience in children | Outdoor games enhance patience in children | Verb tense error; use present tense for general statements |
| children learned how they act at the right time | children learn how to act at the right time | Tense and structure; use present tense and infinitive for general statements |
| Outdoor games developed human personality and body language | Outdoor games develop human personality and body language | Verb tense error; use present tense for general statements |
Vocabulary Improvements
5 suggestions| Original Word/Phrase | Improved Word/Phrase | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| bad effect | negative effect | 'Bad' is informal and vague; 'negative' is more precise and academic |
| body growth | physical development | 'Body growth' is less academic; 'physical development' is a standard term |
| motor activity | motor skills | 'Motor activity' is not idiomatic in this context; 'motor skills' refers to coordination and movement |
| do outdoor games | play outdoor games | Incorrect collocation; 'play' is used with games |
| Well, from my perspective | From my perspective | 'Well' is informal and should be omitted in academic writing |
Ready to practise? Get instant AI feedback on your verdict.
Submit your Video games essay and receive AI scores across all four IELTS criteria — with specific feedback on whether your solutions are specific, realistic, and matched to your problems.
Detailed Criteria Feedback
AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion
Task Response5.5
Evaluation
The essay presents a clear position that drawbacks outweigh benefits and covers both sides, but development is superficial. Arguments are listed without detailed explanation or specific evidence, relying on generalizations.
Examples
Mentions 'bad effect on body growth and mental health' without elaboration; compares video games to outdoor games but does not explore this deeply. The conclusion simply restates preference for outdoor games.
How to Improve
Extend each point with specific examples or research findings. For instance, discuss particular health issues (e.g., obesity, eye strain) or skills (e.g., problem-solving in games). Analyze why drawbacks are more significant rather than just stating preferences.
Coherence & Cohesion5
Evaluation
Paragraphs are used but lack logical flow and clear topic sentences. Cohesive devices are basic (e.g., 'On the other hand,' 'Because,' 'In conclusion'), and transitions between ideas are abrupt, affecting readability.
Examples
The introduction jumps to 'Well, from my perspective...' without smooth transition. Body paragraphs shift between positives and negatives without linking phrases. Sentences like 'Because for people who play outdoor games...' start awkwardly.
How to Improve
Use topic sentences to introduce each paragraph's main idea. Employ a range of linking words (e.g., 'however,' 'furthermore,' 'consequently') to connect sentences and paragraphs. Ensure each paragraph focuses on one aspect, such as benefits or drawbacks.
Lexical Resource5
Evaluation
Vocabulary is repetitive and sometimes inaccurate, with limited range. Awkward word choices and collocations hinder precise expression.
Examples
Repeated use of 'hazardous' and 'body growth'; phrases like 'enhanced the motor activity' (likely meaning 'motor skills') are unclear. Simple terms like 'bad effect' and 'learn new skills' are overused.
How to Improve
Expand vocabulary by learning synonyms (e.g., 'detrimental' instead of 'hazardous,' 'physical development' instead of 'body growth'). Practice collocations (e.g., 'develop skills,' 'foster creativity') and use context-appropriate terms for gaming (e.g., 'immersive experiences,' 'cognitive benefits').
Grammatical Range & Accuracy5
Evaluation
Sentence structures are mostly simple with frequent grammatical errors in tense, agreement, and sentence formation. Punctuation is basic, and errors affect clarity.
Examples
Run-on sentences: 'Because for people who play outdoor games, their metabolism is increased...' Tense error: 'Video games enhanced the motor activity' (should be 'enhance' or 'have enhanced'). Incorrect pluralization: 'these give education' (should be 'this gives' or 'these provide').
How to Improve
Practice constructing complex sentences with subordinate clauses. Review verb tenses (present vs. past) and subject-verb agreement. Use punctuation correctly to separate ideas. Proofread to identify and correct fragments or run-ons.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
RELATED ESSAYS
01
Video games are seen by some as a harmless form of entertainment, or even a useful way to learn new skills. However, others argue that video games have a negative impact on the people who play them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits? Write at least 250 words.
Digital Age has become more progressive in this century. Video Games can be compared from 1980's to the present day modern technology. The more it innovates its...
02
In some countries, more and more people are opting to live alone these days than before. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Write at least 250 words.
It is often observed in several nations that people are choosing to live in solitude, as compared to the people before. I belived that this a positive developme...
03
People nowadays prefer to have adventurous and thrilling activities on their holidays, rather than relaxing in a distant place. Do you agree or disagree? Write at least 250 words.
As we move further into the twenty-first century, it has been observed that due to modernisation and globalisation travelling has become more popular trend in r...
04
Relocating big businesses and industries and their workers from urban areas to rural areas could be a good solution for the issues of traffic congestion and housing in major cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?Write at least 250 words.
Many people used to say that moving geant organistion and firms with their employees far the cities can resolve problems with trafic and accomodation in large t...
05
In some countries, more and more people are opting to live alone these days than before. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Write at least 250 words.
In few nations, nowadays many people are choosing to stay alone than before. From my perspective, it is a positive development because a man can live independen...