In this Band 6.5 IELTS essay about traffic congestion, the writer presents a critical opinion on relocating businesses. While clear arguments are provided, there are notable coherence issues and limited lexical variety that could be improved for a higher score.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Agree/ Disagree (Opinion) · Urban Planning · 40 min
Relocating big businesses and industries and their workers from urban areas to rural areas could be a good solution for the issues of traffic congestion and housing in major cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)
Summary: The essay addresses the topic and provides clear reasons for disagreeing with the proposed solution. However, there are areas that need improvement in coherence, lexical variety, and grammatical precision.
Now write your own — and see how your verdict holds up.
Submit your Urban Planning essay and receive AI scores across Task Response, Coherence, Lexical Resource, and Grammar — plus a Band 9 model answer for your exact question.
Traffic congestion and housing are major issues in many cities. Many people suggest that big businesses and industries should be moved to rural areas. I don't find these to be an effective solution. Instead, we should focus on effective transportation systems and good traffic rules, and also, if possible, control of our human population.
One major reason I don't agree with relocating big businesses and their staff is the financial strain it's going to cause. There has to be effective planning and checking of cost, which is also going to take a lot of time, and while all of these are going on, traffic congestion keeps on increasing.
Also, this solution fails to identify the exact problems of traffic congestion and the shortage of houses in these major cities. These issues arise from population growth, lack of an effective transportation system and lack of good traffic rules. Instead of moving these big industries, cities should focus on providing more and good transportation. There should be a diverse range of different transportation systems, such as trains, scooters, bicycles, motorcycles and not just vehicles. Also, control of population by clearing the roadside hawkers and beggars, probably by empowering them or educating them on the risk of their activities.
In conclusion, relocating big businesses and industries is not the best idea. But finding the cause of traffic congestion and actually working on it should help manage these issues, which are the provision of effective systems and good governance. With these suggestions, traffic congestion and housing are going to reduce
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling · Grammar · Vocabulary · Criteria Analysis
Grammatical Mistakes
2 errors| Mistake | Correction | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| traffic congestion keeps on increasing | traffic congestion continues to increase | The phrase 'continues to increase' is more concise and formal than 'keeps on increasing'. |
| and not just vehicles. | instead of just vehicles. | 'Instead of' is a more appropriate conjunction for contrasting options. |
Vocabulary Improvements
2 suggestions| Original Word/Phrase | Improved Word/Phrase | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| control of our human population | population management | The phrase 'population management' is more precise and formally accepted. |
| clearing the roadside hawkers and beggars | addressing issues related to roadside commerce and homelessness | The revised phrase avoids potentially insensitive language and provides a more nuanced understanding. |
Ready to practise? Get instant AI feedback on your verdict.
Submit your Urban Planning essay and receive AI scores across all four IELTS criteria — with specific feedback on whether your solutions are specific, realistic, and matched to your problems.
Detailed Criteria Feedback
AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion
Task Response7
Evaluation
The task response is adequate and addresses the question by presenting a clear opinion and supporting it with relevant reasons.
Examples
The essay provides reasons such as financial strain and identifying core problems of traffic and housing as arguments against relocation.
How to Improve
Consider exploring additional dimensions of the issue or potential counterarguments to provide a more comprehensive response.
Coherence & Cohesion6.5
Evaluation
Coherence and cohesion are maintained to a good extent, with a logical progression of ideas.
Examples
The essay transitions from one main point (financial strain) to another (correctly identifying problems) but lacks smooth transitioning between ideas.
How to Improve
Enhance cohesion by using clearer linking phrases and ensuring each paragraph flows logically to the next.
Lexical Resource6.5
Evaluation
The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary but could benefit from more precision and variation.
Examples
Terms like 'traffic congestion' and 'effective transportation systems' are frequently repeated.
How to Improve
Incorporate synonyms and varied expressions to avoid repetition and exhibit a broader vocabulary.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy6
Evaluation
The essay shows an adequate use of grammar, but there are issues with sentence structure and punctuation.
Examples
Incorrect or awkward constructions, such as 'control of population by clearing the roadside hawkers and beggars.'
How to Improve
Pay attention to sentence structure and ensure that complex sentences are constructed correctly and are easy to comprehend.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
RELATED ESSAYS
01
In some countries, more and more people are opting to live alone these days than before. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Write at least 250 words.
Many people hold different opinions regarding living alone.Some people want to live alone as they wanted to spend their lives on their own terms.If they live al...
02
In some countries, more and more people are opting to live alone these days than before. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Write at least 250 words.
It is often observed in several nations that people are choosing to live in solitude, as compared to the people before. I belived that this a positive developme...
03
Relocating big businesses and industries and their workers from urban areas to rural areas could be a good solution for the issues of traffic congestion and housing in major cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?Write at least 250 words.
It has been observed that industries and business workplaces could be replace from city to natives for solving the traffic jam and housing issues. It has both a...
04
People nowadays prefer to have adventurous and thrilling activities on their holidays, rather than relaxing in a distant place. Do you agree or disagree? Write at least 250 words.
As we move further into the twenty-first century, it has been observed that due to modernisation and globalisation travelling has become more popular trend in r...
05
In some countries, more and more people are opting to live alone these days than before. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Write at least 250 words.
People preferred to live alone these days than before is because they are many factors before making a decision to move out. For the present generation, the wo...