Band 6 IELTS Writing Task 2: Relocating Businesses - Coherence and Clarity Issues
Sample Answer with Feedback

Moving major bussinesses and industrial entities is suggested to be among key resolutions to grid jams in highly populated jurisditions. While economic activities are part of the main causes of traffic jams, moving business and industrial activity with their workers is not the only solution to abating traffic congestion.

Traffic jams are caused by factors such as poor road planning, poor driving skills, economic timing, and overpopulation of people and businesses. When planning setttlements, planners often understimate the rate and potential of population growth. Therefore, these areas overgrow the grey infrastructure such as roads, leading to the imbalance between available driving capacity and the proportion of people. Poor driving skills impead traffic and often cause accidents that lead to the closure of lanes on shared roads. In major cities, economic timing revolves aroung 7-9am and 4-7pm when people have to commute to school and work. During this time, driving populations are aiming to arrive at the destination as soon as possible, thus competing for road-space and causing traffic jams. On the other hand, industrial activity generate revenue for the social and environmental wellbeing of the cities. Businesses and companies are the major tax payers for city governments, among other community social responsibilities. Removing this economic backborne compounds social, equity and environmental challenges of in an urban society.

Instead of moving industrial activity and respective employees to remote areas, it is important to exaust alternative solutions to ensure that the city continues to function after the deconjestion endeavor. It is even more effective to use integrative methods to solve decongestion problems.