Achieving a Band 7 in your IELTS essay on relocating industries requires clear argumentation and effective vocabulary usage. While the response addresses the task well, minor clarity issues and opportunities to enhance vocabulary emerged from the evaluation. Improve your writing skills by reviewing this insightful feedback.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Agree/ Disagree (Opinion) · Urban Planning · 40 min
Relocating big businesses and industries and their workers from urban areas to rural areas could be a good solution for the issues of traffic congestion and housing in major cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)
Summary: Hello User, the essay effectively addresses the task, presents a clear position, and adequately develops the argument with relevant examples and reasoning. The use of cohesive devices aids in the logical progression of ideas, although there are minor lapses in clarity. The vocabulary used is suitable for the topic and context, demonstrating an ability to express ideas clearly, though there could be more variety. The grammatical structures are generally accurate, but occasional errors exist.
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It is often argued that the relocating big businesses and industries and their workers from urban areas to rural areas could be a good solution for the issues of traffic congestion and housing in major cities. While some people beleive that it is not good solution for traffic congestion, I strongly agree with this view because it can significantly reduce urban pressure and promote balanced regional development.
One of the primary reason why I support this view is that moving industries to rural areas would greatly reduce traffic congestion. This is because urban areas decrease environmental degradation, which leads to people travel urban areas for company. For instance, many metropolitan cities experience rush-hour traffic jams because a large number of workers commute to centralized business districts every day.
Secondly, this approach can effectively address the issue of housing shortages. Urban areas often face high demand for accommodation, causing property prices and rents to rise dramatically. If businesses are relocated, many workers will move to rural areas, reducing population density in cities. Consequently, housing demand will decrease, making it more affordable for people to find suitable living spaces.
Moreover, relocating industries can boost the economic development of rural areas. It will create job opportunities, improve infrastructure, and raise the standard of living in these regions. This balanced growth can reduce the gap between urban and rural areas, which is beneficial for a country’s overall progress.
In conclusion, I strongly agree that moving businesses and industries to rural areas is an effective solution to urban problems, as it reduces congestion, solves housing issues, and promotes national development.
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling · Grammar · Vocabulary · Criteria Analysis
Spelling Mistakes
1 errors| Misspelled Word | Corrected Word |
|---|---|
| beleive | believe |
Grammatical Mistakes
4 errors| Mistake | Correction | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| the relocating big businesses and industries and their workers from urban areas to rural areas | relocating big businesses, industries, and their workers from urban areas to rural areas | Redundant article usage and needed commas for better list separation. |
| It is not good solution | It is not a good solution | Article misuse: 'a' is required before 'good solution'. |
| One of the primary reason | One of the primary reasons | Subject-verb agreement: 'reasons' should be plural to match 'one of the'. |
| which leads to people travel urban areas for company | which leads to people traveling to urban areas for company | Correct form of gerund: 'travel' should be 'traveling'. |
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Detailed Criteria Feedback
AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion
Task Response7
Evaluation
The essay clearly addresses the task prompt and provides a well-explained response.
Examples
The reasons for supporting relocation are explained with examples about traffic congestion and housing demand.
How to Improve
Provide more detailed examples or evidence to support your claims, particularly on economic impacts.
Coherence & Cohesion7
Evaluation
The response is logically organized and uses cohesive devices effectively.
Examples
Phrases like 'One of the primary reason', 'Secondly', and 'Moreover' guide the reader through the argument.
How to Improve
Ensure more seamless transitions between ideas for improved flow and consider using varied cohesive devices.
Lexical Resource7
Evaluation
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary that is used appropriately for the topic.
Examples
Terms like 'relocating industries', 'housing shortages', and 'economic development' are used accurately.
How to Improve
Incorporate a wider range of specific and sophisticated vocabulary to enhance precision.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy7
Evaluation
The response shows control of grammatical structures with few errors.
Examples
Phrases such as 'reduce congestion' and 'promote national development' are used correctly.
How to Improve
Pay attention to minor grammatical errors and try to incorporate a greater variety of sentence structures.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
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