This Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 essay explores the advantages and disadvantages of internet communication. While it discusses some benefits, such as staying connected with loved ones, it lacks a balanced view and misses counterarguments. Improving task response and coherence will help achieve a higher score.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Advantages/ Disadvantages Β· Internet Β· 40 min
The internet connects people from different places and makes the world feel smaller. Discuss the arguments for and against the idea that the internet has simplified communication between individuals and provide your own opinion on the matter.
Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1β9)
Summary: The essay meets the word count (350 words) but does not fully address the task. It only discusses arguments for the internet simplifying communication and omits arguments against, which significantly impacts Task Response. The essay has a basic structure with some cohesive devices, but lexical choices are informal with spelling errors, and grammatical errors are frequent.
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The internet connects people from different places and make the world feel smaller, which in my opinion is such a wonderful thing, that you can see and hear your loved ones from any corner of the world.
Nowadays, technology has made it lot more easier for people to reach their families, friends and their loved ones through a single click on their phones, making you feel that your dear ones are just a call away from you. For example, you are sad and missing your friend, want to do some gossip and due to certain circumstances you are unable to go and meet them, so you can just make a video call and gossip" title="Correction: share gossip">spill the tea out in front of them and talk for hours. Secondly, you are living far away from your home but still you can see your parents and siblings daily on video call, and catch up with them easily. Besides, if all your cousins are enjoying any festival or a wedding or any other ceremony in your home town and you don't want to miss it out, you can be join that event online and be a part of it. In short, we can say that it had made world accessible in every possible way.
Furthermore, internet has made your work life easier as well, like you don't feel like going to work, so you can avail the option of work from home. Other than this, it also has increased the job oppurtunities as you can work remotely with different companies from around the world, with better salary packages and better terms and conditions. It is also playing major role in improving your education, becuase you can go for different online certifications from the best universities of the world, which will not only polish your skill but will also improve your resume.
So, it can summed up that, internet had really made the world feel smaller in every possible way. It had reduced the fear of lonliness for the people living far away from their loved ones, it had made communication easier in every possible way.
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling Β· Grammar Β· Vocabulary Β· Criteria Analysis
Spelling Mistakes
3 errors| Misspelled Word | Corrected Word |
|---|---|
| oppurtunities | opportunities |
| becuase | because |
| lonliness | loneliness |
Grammatical Mistakes
12 errors| Mistake | Correction | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| make the world feel smaller | makes the world feel smaller | Subject-verb agreement: 'the internet' is singular and requires 'makes' |
| lot more easier | much easier | Redundant comparative; 'easier' is already comparative, so 'more easier' is incorrect |
| you can be join that event | you can join that event | Incorrect verb form; 'be join' is not grammatically correct |
| it had made world accessible | it has made the world accessible | Tense error; present perfect 'has made' is appropriate, and article 'the' before 'world' |
| internet has made | the internet has made | Article omission; 'internet' typically requires the definite article 'the' in formal writing |
| avail the option of work from home | take advantage of the option to work from home | Incorrect verb usage; 'avail' is not used correctly here; standard phrase is 'avail oneself of' or more commonly 'use the option' |
| playing major role | playing a major role | Missing article; 'a' is needed before 'major role' |
| polish your skill | polish your skills | Noun number agreement; 'skill' should be plural 'skills' to match the context |
| it can summed up that | it can be summed up that | Missing auxiliary verb; 'can' requires 'be' for passive voice |
| internet had really made | the internet has really made | Tense and article error; present perfect 'has made' and article 'the' |
| It had reduced | It has reduced | Tense error; should be present perfect 'has reduced' |
| it had made communication easier | it has made communication easier | Tense error; present perfect 'has made' |
Vocabulary Improvements
7 suggestions| Original Word/Phrase | Improved Word/Phrase | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| spill the tea | share gossip | Informal slang; use more standard English |
| avail the option | use the option | Incorrect collocation; 'avail' is not typically used in this way |
| salary packages | compensation packages | 'Salary packages' is acceptable but 'compensation packages' is more precise in professional contexts |
| gossip | converse | Informal; in academic writing, more formal terms are preferred |
| dear ones | loved ones | 'Dear ones' is slightly archaic; 'loved ones' is more contemporary |
| catch up with them easily | easily keep in touch with them | 'Catch up' is informal; 'keep in touch' is more neutral |
| polish your skill | enhance your skills | 'Polish' is informal; 'enhance' is more academic, and 'skills' should be plural |
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Detailed Criteria Feedback
AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion
Task Response5
Evaluation
The essay partially addresses the task by presenting arguments in favor of the internet simplifying communication, such as video calls with family and remote work opportunities. However, it fails to discuss any arguments against (e.g., reduced face-to-face interaction, digital divide, or privacy issues). An opinion is given but without a balanced discussion.
Examples
Examples include using video calls to connect with loved ones and online certifications for education. No counterarguments are provided.
How to Improve
To improve, ensure a balanced discussion by presenting both sides of the argument. Discuss potential drawbacks of internet communication before stating your opinion. For instance, mention issues like misinformation, social isolation, or dependency on technology.
Coherence & Cohesion5.5
Evaluation
The essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Cohesive devices like 'for example,' 'secondly,' and 'furthermore' are used to link ideas. However, the flow is somewhat informal, and paragraphing could be more logical, with ideas mixed between personal and professional contexts.
Examples
The body paragraphs jump from personal communication to work and education without clear transitions. The conclusion repeats points from the introduction.
How to Improve
Use more formal linking words and ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. For example, separate paragraphs for arguments for, arguments against, and a conclusion with a summarized opinion. Improve topic sentences to guide the reader.
Lexical Resource5.5
Evaluation
Vocabulary is adequate but informal and repetitive, with several spelling errors. Colloquial expressions are used, which are not suitable for academic writing.
Examples
Informal phrases: 'spill the tea.' Spelling errors: 'oppurtunities' (opportunities), 'becuase' (because), 'lonliness' (loneliness). Repetition of 'loved ones' and 'dear ones.'
How to Improve
Use more formal and varied vocabulary. Avoid slang; instead of 'spill the tea,' use 'share gossip' or 'discuss freely.' Proofread for spelling errors. Expand lexical range with synonyms like 'relatives' for 'loved ones' and 'enhance' for 'improve.'
Grammatical Range & Accuracy5
Evaluation
There are frequent grammatical errors, especially in verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. Attempts at complex sentences are made but with inaccuracies.
Examples
Errors: 'make the world feel smaller' (should be 'makes'), 'lot more easier' (should be 'much easier'), 'it had made' (should be 'it has made'), 'you can be join' (should be 'you can join'), 'it can summed up' (should be 'it can be summed up').
How to Improve
Practice using correct verb tenses (e.g., present perfect for ongoing effects). Ensure subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'internet has' not 'internet have'). Use a variety of sentence structures with proper punctuation. Review grammar rules for comparative adjectives and passive voice.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
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