In this Band 5 IELTS Writing Task 2 essay about planning free time, the writer discusses the benefits of structure but struggles with balance. Key issues include unclear paragraph structure and incomplete exploration of unplanned leisure time benefits.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Advantages/ Disadvantages · Time Management · 40 min
Some individuals favour planning their free time activities very carefully. Others go for having no plans at all for their free time. What are the benefits of having a schedule for your free time compared to the benefits of leaving it unplanned? Which approach to leisure time do you prefer and what are your reasons?
Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)
Summary: The essay meets the word count requirement and addresses the topic partially. It discusses benefits of planning free time and presents a personal preference for planning, but it fails to adequately explore the benefits of leaving free time unplanned. The response is developed with personal examples but lacks balance and clear focus. Coherence is affected by unclear paragraph structure and weak linking. Vocabulary is limited with several spelling and word choice errors. Grammar contains frequent errors that impede clarity, though some complex sentences are attempted.
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Our time is the most precious gift God, and we should know" title="Correction: given by God, and we should know">given by god , that we should know how to manage it carefully .
In this case , some individuals favour planning their free time activities with attention ,
others go for having no plans at all for their free time. This essay will discuss the advantages and the disadvantages of how to master our free time in order to achieve the benefit.
To begin with , one major issue is that this wasting of time leads to lose many of opportunities in order to upgrade our personalities and visions , in addition letting our time without plan can be some what harmfull for our future , adding to that , for instance , one year ago i wasted many time on doing such things that dammaged me like scrolling a lot of hours on internet , instgram and tiktok and i lived a period of time in illusion so from my prespective , i wonder to plan my free time very carefully thanks to its uncontable advantages.
First of all , a potential benefit would be increases overall life satisfaction , reduces stress , and boosts mental health by ensuring a proper work-life balance. Furthermore , By planning leisure , individuals experience less fatigue, enhanced creativity, better social relationships , and higher quality of life . By focusing on time managment , It allows for intentional relaxation and personal growth , alleviating burnout. Another key point is that by planning , individuals will manifest their time by for exemple learning new things such as learning new skills or descovering a hidden talent taking a simple exemple , The last year when i was spending my summer vocation , I descovered that i'm gifted in music and i master playing violent so tried to improve this skill in order to achieve my dream and become a musicien .
To sum up ,from my point of vue , i think that mastering time and not westing it isn't easy for all the individuals so every single one have to sit a schedule for his free time to benefit it and to get more developed and satisfied and never regrets .
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling · Grammar · Vocabulary · Criteria Analysis
Spelling Mistakes
15 errors| Misspelled Word | Corrected Word |
|---|---|
| harmfull | harmful |
| dammaged | damaged |
| instgram | |
| tiktok | TikTok |
| prespective | perspective |
| uncontable | countless |
| managment | management |
| exemple | example |
| descovering | discovering |
| vocation | vacation |
| violent | violin |
| musicien | musician |
| vue | view |
| westing | wasting |
| god | God |
Grammatical Mistakes
18 errors| Mistake | Correction | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| given by god , that we should know | given by God, and we should know | Comma before 'that' is incorrect; use 'and' to connect clauses |
| leads to lose many of opportunities | leads to losing many opportunities | 'leads to' requires a noun or gerund, not a verb in base form |
| letting our time without plan | leaving our time unplanned | Incorrect phrasing; 'letting without' is not standard English |
| i wasted many time | I wasted much time | 'many' is used with countable nouns; 'time' is uncountable, so use 'much' or 'a lot of' |
| on internet | on the internet | Article missing before 'internet' |
| i lived a period of time in illusion | I lived in illusion for a period of time | Awkward word order; better to rephrase for clarity |
| i wonder to plan | I intend to plan | 'Wonder' means to be curious, not to intend; incorrect verb usage |
| would be increases overall life satisfaction | would be increased overall life satisfaction | Subject-verb agreement; 'increases' should be 'increased' to function as a noun in this context |
| By planning leisure , | by planning leisure, | 'By' should not be capitalized mid-sentence |
| By focusing on time managment , It allows | By focusing on time management, it allows | 'It' should be lowercase, and the clause structure is awkward; better to rephrase |
| individuals will manifest their time | individuals will utilize their time | 'Manifest' is not typically used with 'time'; incorrect collocation |
| by for exemple learning | by, for example, learning | 'For example' should be set off with commas |
| The last year when i was spending | Last year, when I was spending | 'The last year' is incorrect; use 'Last year' for past reference |
| so tried to improve | so I tried to improve | Subject missing in clause |
| isn't easy for all the individuals | is not easy for all individuals | Contraction 'isn't' is informal; 'the individuals' is redundant |
| every single one have to sit a schedule | every single one has to set a schedule | Subject-verb agreement: 'one has'; 'sit a schedule' is incorrect, use 'set a schedule' |
| to benefit it | to benefit from it | Preposition 'from' missing |
| and never regrets | and never regret | Verb form should be base form in this context |
Vocabulary Improvements
10 suggestions| Original Word/Phrase | Improved Word/Phrase | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| go for having | choose to have | Too informal; use more academic phrasing |
| upgrade our personalities and visions | enhance our personalities and perspectives | 'Upgrade' is often used for technology, not personal traits; 'visions' is vague, use 'perspectives' |
| dammaged me | harmed me | 'Damaged' is strong and typically for objects; for people, 'harmed' is more appropriate |
| scrolling a lot of hours | spending many hours scrolling | Informal and vague; 'a lot of' is colloquial |
| lived a period of time in illusion | was deluded for a time | Awkward phrasing; 'deluded' is more precise |
| i wonder to plan | I intend to plan | 'Wonder' is incorrect; use 'intend' for planning |
| manifest their time | utilize their time | 'Manifest' means to display or show, not to use; wrong collocation |
| sit a schedule | set a schedule | Incorrect verb-noun collocation; 'set a schedule' is standard |
| benefit it | benefit from it | Missing preposition; 'benefit from' is correct |
| get more developed | become more developed | 'Get' is informal; use 'become' for change of state |
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Task Response
5
Evaluation
The essay partially addresses the task. It presents benefits of planning free time (e.g., life satisfaction, stress reduction) and disadvantages of not planning, but it does not clearly discuss the benefits of leaving free time unplanned as required. The writer's preference is stated and supported with personal examples, but the response lacks a balanced comparison. Some content is irrelevant, such as the opening statement about time being a gift from God.
Examples
The essay states: 'a potential benefit would be increases overall life satisfaction, reduces stress...' but does not mention benefits of spontaneity, like relaxation or creativity from unstructured time. The personal example about scrolling on the internet illustrates wasted time but does not contrast with potential advantages of unplanned leisure.
How to Improve
Ensure you address all parts of the question equally. Discuss both the benefits of planning and the benefits of not planning. For example, mention how unplanned time can allow for spontaneity, relaxation, and unexpected joys. Stay focused on the comparison asked for, and avoid tangential statements.
Coherence and Cohesion
5
Evaluation
The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, ideas are not logically organized within paragraphs. The first body paragraph mixes disadvantages of unplanned time with a personal example without clear transition. Linking words are used but sometimes incorrectly, and paragraphing could be improved to separate different points.
Examples
The paragraph beginning 'To begin with' introduces a 'major issue' but then shifts to a personal anecdote about internet use. The connection between sentences is weak. Phrases like 'Furthermore' and 'Another key point' are used but do not always connect ideas clearly.
How to Improve
Plan your essay structure before writing. Use separate paragraphs for different ideas: one for benefits of planning, one for benefits of not planning, and one for your opinion. Use a range of cohesive devices accurately (e.g., 'on the other hand,' 'in contrast') to show comparison. Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence.
Lexical Resource
5
Evaluation
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, with several spelling and word formation errors. Some attempts at less common vocabulary are made (e.g., 'intentional relaxation,' 'alleviating burnout'), but inaccuracies are frequent. Informal or incorrect word choices reduce clarity.
Examples
Misspellings: 'westing' (wasting), 'descovering' (discovering), 'violient' (likely 'violin'), 'musicien' (musician). Awkward phrasing: 'thanks to its uncontable advantages' (countless advantages). Word choice error: 'manifest their time' (likely 'manage their time').
How to Improve
Expand your vocabulary related to time management and leisure activities. Practice spelling and word forms. Use a dictionary to check correct spelling and usage. Avoid informal language (e.g., 'i wonder to plan' should be 'I prefer to plan'). Read sample essays to see appropriate vocabulary in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
5
Evaluation
There is an attempt to use a variety of sentence structures, but grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes impede meaning. Issues include subject-verb agreement, tense errors, article misuse, incorrect prepositions, and run-on sentences. Punctuation is inconsistent.
Examples
Subject-verb agreement: 'a potential benefit would be increases' (should be 'would be an increase' or 'would increase'). Tense error: 'i wasted many time' (should be 'I wasted a lot of time'). Article misuse: 'become a musicien' (a musician). Preposition: 'thanks to its uncontable advantages' (better: 'because of its countless advantages'). Run-on: '...in order to upgrade our personalities and visions , in addition letting our time without plan can be...' (should be two sentences).
How to Improve
Review basic grammar rules, especially subject-verb agreement, articles, and tense consistency. Practice writing complex sentences with correct punctuation. Proofread your essays to identify and correct errors. Consider using grammar check tools to become aware of common mistakes.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
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