This Band 5.5 IELTS essay discusses urban challenges like traffic and pollution but lacks clarity and detailed development. Identifying specific examples would strengthen the argument and enhance overall coherence.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Problem/ Solution · City Life · 40 min
Many people are moving to urban areas in hopes of finding a better life, but living in a city can be very challenging. What are some of the problems that city dwellers face? How can governments improve the quality of life for urban residents?
Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)
Summary: The essay meets the minimum word count (279 words) and addresses both parts of the question, discussing problems (traffic, pollution) and solutions (public transport, healthcare). However, ideas are underdeveloped, and language errors in grammar and vocabulary reduce clarity. The structure is clear but coherence is affected by abrupt transitions.
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People have different views about whether in urban areas there is a better life or there are also challenges. In this essay, I will discuss about the drawback of living in the city and how governments can increase the quality of life in urban area.
One of the main challenges of the living in the urban area is traffic and congestion. This is because, people follow similar working routine. For example, in Milan workers start their morning at 9 o'clock and they finish eat 5 o'clock. As a result, people spend a lot of time on the road in traffic to came back home. Moreover, in urban area frequently there is a lot of pollution. This causes respiratory problems. For instance, Cremona city has the highest rate of pollution, consequently people have also the highest number of respiratory disease per year.
In order to improve the quality of life in city areas governments should invest in public transport. This is because people con leave their cars at home. For example, in New York when the new metro line opened the number of people who were using cars dropped. Consequently, the air pollution decreased. Moreover, territorial health services are needed" title="Correction: new hospitals and territorial health services are needed">new hospital and territorial health services need. In this way, is possible to cur respiratory diseases and provide to the people a better life. For example, Cremona city has three hospitals and it have several health services for adults and children. As a result, people have always an opportunity to be healthy.
In conclusion, people who are living in urban areas have benefits, however there are some challenges as traffic and air pollution. Government should invest more in public transport to reduce these two problems.
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling · Grammar · Vocabulary · Criteria Analysis
Spelling Mistakes
2 errors| Misspelled Word | Corrected Word |
|---|---|
| con | can |
| cur | cure |
Grammatical Mistakes
13 errors| Mistake | Correction | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| discuss about | discuss | 'Discuss' is a transitive verb and does not require 'about'. |
| the living in the urban area | living in urban areas | Unnecessary article 'the' before 'living'. |
| This is because, people follow | This is because people follow | Comma splice; no comma needed after 'because'. |
| they finish eat 5 o'clock | they finish at 5 o'clock | Incorrect verb structure; 'finish' should be followed by 'at' for time. |
| to came back home | to come back home | Infinitive form should be 'come' not 'came'. |
| in urban area frequently there is | in urban areas, there is frequently | Missing plural and article; 'urban areas' and better adverb placement. |
| consequently people have also the highest number | consequently, people also have the highest number | Word order issue; 'also' should precede the verb. |
| new hospital and territorial health services need | new hospitals and territorial health services are needed | Incomplete sentence; missing verb 'are needed'. |
| In this way, is possible to cur | In this way, it is possible to cure | Missing subject 'it'. |
| provide to the people | provide people with | Preposition error; 'provide' can be used with 'with' or directly with the object. |
| it have several health services | it has several health services | Subject-verb agreement; 'it' requires 'has'. |
| people have always an opportunity | people always have an opportunity | Adverb placement; 'always' should come before the verb. |
| challenges as traffic | challenges such as traffic | 'As' is informal; 'such as' is more appropriate for listing examples. |
Vocabulary Improvements
6 suggestions| Original Word/Phrase | Improved Word/Phrase | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| increase the quality of life | improve the quality of life | 'Improve' is the standard collocation with 'quality of life'. |
| working routine | work schedules | 'Working routine' is slightly awkward; 'work schedules' is more precise. |
| start their morning | start their day | 'Start their morning' is informal; 'start their day' is more natural. |
| a lot of | considerable | 'A lot of' is informal; use more formal quantifiers. |
| territorial health services | local health services | 'Territorial' might be correct in context, but 'local' is more commonly used. |
| have always an opportunity | always have access to opportunities | Awkward phrasing; improved for fluency. |
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Detailed Criteria Feedback
AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion
Task Response6
Evaluation
The essay responds to the task by identifying problems (traffic congestion, pollution) and suggesting government actions (invest in public transport, healthcare). However, the development is limited, and examples are simplistic without deeper analysis.
Examples
Problems: traffic due to similar working routines in Milan; pollution in Cremona causing respiratory diseases. Solutions: public transport investment as in New York; building hospitals and health services in Cremona.
How to Improve
Expand on each problem and solution with more detail, explain the links between causes and effects, and provide more varied or specific examples to strengthen the argument.
Coherence & Cohesion6
Evaluation
The essay has a basic structure with introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Cohesive devices are used (e.g., 'Moreover', 'Consequently'), but transitions between ideas are sometimes abrupt, affecting flow.
Examples
The first body paragraph jumps from traffic to pollution without a smooth link. The conclusion repeats points without synthesizing them effectively.
How to Improve
Use a wider range of linking words (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'In addition'), ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, and improve paragraph transitions for better logical flow.
Lexical Resource5.5
Evaluation
Vocabulary is adequate but repetitive and with errors. Some terms are misspelled or misused, limiting precision and range.
Examples
Errors: 'con' for 'can', 'cur' for 'cure', 'finish eat' for 'finish at'. Repetition of 'urban area' and basic words like 'people', 'problems'.
How to Improve
Use synonyms (e.g., 'metropolis' for 'city', 'inhabitants' for 'dwellers'), learn correct spelling, and incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary (e.g., 'infrastructure', 'sustainability').
Grammatical Range & Accuracy5.5
Evaluation
Sentence structures are mostly simple, with frequent grammatical errors that hinder clarity. Attempts at complex sentences are marred by mistakes.
Examples
Incorrect verb forms: 'to came back home' (should be 'to come back home'), 'it have' (should be 'it has'). Missing subject: 'new hospital and territorial health services need' (should be 'are needed').
How to Improve
Practice using a variety of sentence structures (compound, complex), focus on verb tense consistency, and proofread to correct errors in subject-verb agreement and word form.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
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