This Band 5 IELTS essay addresses the challenges city dwellers face, including job scarcity and housing costs, but lacks depth in analysis. With coherence issues and under-length content, there is room for improvement in developing ideas and language accuracy.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Problem/ Solution · City Life · 40 min
Many people are moving to urban areas in hopes of finding a better life, but living in a city can be very challenging. What are some of the problems that city dwellers face? How can governments improve the quality of life for urban residents?
Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)
Summary: The essay addresses the topic but is under-length (246 words vs required 250), which impacts Task Response. Ideas are presented but not fully developed, and there are issues with language accuracy and coherence.
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In recent years, the problem of urbanisaton is disscused widely. Many rural people are shifting to cities in hopes of finding a better life but this comes with various challenges. For example finding a good job opportunities, managing finances for better quality of education for their children. This essay will focus on some of the disadvantages that the city dwellers face and how government can help to improve the quality of life for urban residents.
One of the major problem that town dwellers face is lack of job opportunities. This means, the competition for job has increased. The ratio of job vaccany to interns is 1 is to 10. In addition the cost of living has increased significantly. People can not afford to pay high rents of the house. In addition traffic also plays the important role, this lead to noise pollution.
Governments can help to improve this by providing affordable housing. The rent of house or the EMI's should be low. Government should provide housing loan with low rate of intrest. Moreover, in peak traffic hours, on every signal a traffic police should be present to control the traffic. High fine should be given to the people who are honking unnecessarily and driving without license.
In conclusion, although everyone has a right to live in modern cities and persure higher education but this will be beneficial only if it is followed with proper government guildlines. People should obely the rules and regulations with proper discipline.
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling · Grammar · Vocabulary · Criteria Analysis
Spelling Mistakes
7 errors| Misspelled Word | Corrected Word |
|---|---|
| urbanisaton | urbanization |
| disscused | discussed |
| vaccany | vacancy |
| intrest | interest |
| persure | pursue |
| guildlines | guidelines |
| obely | obey |
Grammatical Mistakes
8 errors| Mistake | Correction | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| For example finding a good job opportunities | For example, finding good job opportunities | Missing comma after 'example' and incorrect article usage; 'a' is not needed before 'good job opportunities'. |
| One of the major problem that town dwellers face | One of the major problems that town dwellers face | Subject-verb agreement: 'problem' should be plural to match 'one of the'. |
| This means, the competition for job has increased. | This means the competition for jobs has increased. | Unnecessary comma after 'means' and 'job' should be plural to match the context. |
| People can not afford to pay high rents of the house. | People cannot afford to pay high rents for housing. | 'Can not' should be written as 'cannot', and 'of the house' is awkward; 'for housing' is more appropriate. |
| this lead to noise pollution. | this leads to noise pollution. | Subject-verb agreement: 'this' is singular and requires 'leads'. |
| High fine should be given to the people | High fines should be imposed on people | Incorrect singular/plural usage and awkward phrasing; 'fines' should be plural, and 'imposed on' is more formal. |
| driving without license. | driving without a license. | Missing article 'a' before 'license'. |
| but this will be beneficial only if it is followed with proper government guildlines. | but this will be beneficial only if it is accompanied by proper government guidelines. | 'Followed with' is incorrect; 'accompanied by' is more appropriate. |
Vocabulary Improvements
4 suggestions| Original Word/Phrase | Improved Word/Phrase | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| better quality of education | higher quality of education | 'Higher quality' is a more precise and formal collocation. |
| plays the important role | plays an important role | Incorrect article usage; 'an' is correct before 'important role'. |
| on every signal a traffic police should be present | a traffic officer should be present at every signal | 'Traffic police' is not used for a single individual; 'traffic officer' is more accurate. |
| People should obely the rules and regulations with proper discipline. | People should obey the rules and regulations with discipline. | 'Proper discipline' is redundant; 'discipline' alone suffices. |
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Detailed Criteria Feedback
AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion
Task Response5
Evaluation
The essay responds to the prompt by listing some problems (e.g., job opportunities, cost of living, traffic) and solutions (e.g., affordable housing, traffic control). However, development is limited, with points not extended or supported with detailed examples. The conclusion is generic and does not effectively summarize the arguments.
Examples
For instance, the claim about job vacancy ratios ('1 is to 10') is vague and unexplained. Solutions like 'government should provide housing loan with low rate of intrest' lack elaboration on implementation or impact.
How to Improve
Extend each idea with specific examples, data, or explanations to deepen the analysis. Ensure the essay meets the minimum word count by expanding on causes, effects, and practical steps for solutions.
Coherence & Cohesion5
Evaluation
A basic structure is present (introduction, body paragraphs, conclusion), but coherence is hampered by abrupt transitions and repetitive linking words. Paragraphing is attempted but could be more logically organized.
Examples
In the first body paragraph, the shift from 'job opportunities' to 'cost of living' to 'traffic' is abrupt. The phrase 'In addition' is used multiple times without variation, reducing flow.
How to Improve
Use a wider range of cohesive devices (e.g., 'furthermore', 'however', 'as a result') to connect ideas smoothly. Ensure each paragraph focuses on one main topic, with clear topic sentences and logical progression.
Lexical Resource5
Evaluation
Vocabulary is basic and repetitive, with several spelling errors that impede communication. Limited lexical range reduces the precision and sophistication of expression.
Examples
Misspellings: 'urbanisaton' (urbanization), 'disscused' (discussed), 'vaccany' (vacancy), 'intrest' (interest). Repetition of words like 'problem' and 'government' without synonyms.
How to Improve
Expand vocabulary by learning and using topic-specific terms (e.g., 'urban sprawl', 'public transport', 'subsidized housing'). Proofread carefully to correct spelling errors and use a thesaurus for word variety.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy5
Evaluation
There is an attempt to use a mix of simple and complex structures, but frequent grammatical errors and punctuation mistakes affect clarity and accuracy. Sentence construction is often faulty.
Examples
Errors include: 'this lead to noise pollution' (should be 'leads'); missing comma after 'In addition'; 'People can not afford' (should be 'cannot afford'); 'EMI's' (incorrect apostrophe use).
How to Improve
Focus on subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and correct article usage. Practice forming complex sentences with subordinate clauses. Review punctuation rules, especially for commas in lists and after introductory phrases.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
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