Achieving a band 6 in this IELTS essay on academic pressure highlights important development issues faced by teenagers. While addressing the causes and solutions effectively, the essay falls just below the required word count. Improvements in depth and careful proofreading could enhance its overall quality.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Problem/ Solution · Education · 40 min
Academic pressure is causing mental health issues among teenagers, including anxiety, depression, and burnout.This growing problem is affecting students’ well-being and long-term development.
What are the causes of this issue, and what solutions can be suggested?Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)
Summary: The essay addresses the question by discussing causes and solutions for academic pressure causing mental health issues among teenagers. However, it falls just short of the required 250-word minimum (actual: 249 words). This limits the depth of development and slightly reduces the Task Response score. The essay is coherent and well-structured, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Vocabulary is adequate but could be more varied, and there is a minor spelling error ('addres' instead of 'address'). Grammar is generally correct but relies on simple structures. Overall, the essay is competent but needs fuller development and careful proofreading.
Now write your own — and see how your verdict holds up.
Submit your Education essay and receive AI scores across Task Response, Coherence, Lexical Resource, and Grammar — plus a Band 9 model answer for your exact question.
Academic pressure has become a significant factor contributing to mental health issues among teenagers, including anxiety, depression, and burnout. This problem is increasingly visible in many education systems, where students are expected to meet high academic standards while also balancing extracurricular activities and personal responsibilities. Understanding the causes of this issue is essential in order to develop effective solutions.
One of the primary causes of academic pressure is the intense competition for university admissions and future career opportunities. Many students feel that their entire future depends on achieving top grades, which creates constant stress and fear of failure. Parental expectations also play a major role. In some cases, parents unintentionally place excessive pressure on their children to succeed academically, equating good grades with personal worth or future success.
To addres this issue, several solutions can be implemented. Schools should prioritize students’ mental health by incorporating counseling services and stress-management programs into the curriculum. Reducing the emphasis on high-stakes exams and promoting alternative forms of assessment can also help alleviate pressure. Parents need to adopt a more supportive approach, encouraging effort and personal growth rather than focusing solely on results. Open communication between parents and children is crucial in creating a healthy environment.
In conclusion, academic pressure among teenagers is a complex issue caused by societal expectations, competitive education systems, and lifestyle imbalances. By addressing these causes through collaborative efforts from schools, parents, and students, it is possible to reduce its negative impact and support healthier development for young people.
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling · Grammar · Vocabulary · Criteria Analysis
Spelling Mistakes
1 errors| Misspelled Word | Corrected Word |
|---|---|
| addres | address |
Ready to practise? Get instant AI feedback on your verdict.
Submit your Education essay and receive AI scores across all four IELTS criteria — with specific feedback on whether your solutions are specific, realistic, and matched to your problems.
Detailed Criteria Feedback
AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion
Task Response6
Evaluation
The essay adequately addresses both parts of the question (causes and solutions) and stays on topic. However, it is 1 word below the minimum 250-word requirement, which limits the depth of explanation and slightly weakens task fulfillment.
Examples
Causes discussed: intense competition for university admissions, parental expectations. Solutions: school counseling, alternative assessments, parental support. These points are relevant but could be elaborated further.
How to Improve
Ensure the essay meets the word count by adding more specific examples or expanding on each cause and solution. For instance, provide a real-world example of a school reducing exam pressure or discuss the role of social media in amplifying competition.
Coherence & Cohesion7
Evaluation
The essay is well-organized with a clear logical flow. The introduction presents the topic, body paragraphs cover causes and solutions separately, and the conclusion summarizes. Cohesive devices are used appropriately, though they could be more varied.
Examples
Transition phrases like 'One of the primary causes' and 'To address this issue' effectively guide the reader. However, some paragraphs could benefit from internal linking (e.g., between causes and solutions).
How to Improve
Use a wider range of cohesive devices (e.g., 'furthermore', 'as a result', 'in addition') to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that the conclusion restates the main points without introducing new ideas.
Lexical Resource6.5
Evaluation
The vocabulary is adequate and appropriate for the task, with some good collocations (e.g., 'high academic standards', 'intense competition', 'constant stress'). However, the range is somewhat limited, and there is a spelling error ('addres'). Word choice is generally precise but could be more sophisticated.
Examples
Good: 'significant factor', 'unintentionally place excessive pressure', 'equating good grades with personal worth'. Weakness: 'To addres this issue' (spelling mistake) and repetition of 'pressure'.
How to Improve
Expand vocabulary by using synonyms (e.g., 'strain', 'burden', 'demands' for pressure) and more formal academic expressions (e.g., 'mitigate', 'alleviate', 'foster'). Proofread to eliminate spelling errors.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy6
Evaluation
The grammar is mostly accurate, with correct subject-verb agreement and tense usage. Sentences are generally simple or compound, with limited use of complex structures. There is one notable error ('addres' should be 'address') and a minor punctuation issue (missing comma after 'In some cases').
Examples
Correct: 'Understanding the causes... is essential', 'Students feel that their entire future depends on achieving top grades'. Error: 'To addres this issue' (missing 's').
How to Improve
Practice using more complex sentence structures, such as conditional clauses ('If parents... then students...') or relative clauses ('Students who face... may benefit...'). Review spelling and punctuation carefully before submission.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
RELATED ESSAYS
01
Student behaviour is a serious issue in many schools around the world. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest? Write at least 250 words.
There is an old line in the Philippines where a person can be judge with their character at home based on the behavior they display publicly. It is fundamental ...
02
Drug abuse has become a growing concern in many societies. What are the factors that contribute to the increasing problem of drug abuse in our society, and how can we address them? Write at least 250 words.
In recent years, many countries have been facing a variety of social and economic challenges. Among these, the issue mentioned in the statement has become a ma...
03
Drug abuse has become a growing concern in many societies. What are the factors that contribute to the increasing problem of drug abuse in our society, and how can we address them? Write at least 250 words.
Nowadays, people with illnesses are increasing rapidly due to the contamination in the environment and unhealthy diets. Becoming a reason to use medicine to mai...
04
Drug abuse has become a growing concern in many societies. What are the factors that contribute to the increasing problem of drug abuse in our society, and how can we address them? Write at least 250 words.
In this century, the topic of incresing of drug abuses has become a subject of great importance and frequently discussed by the people all over the world. Some ...
05
In many schools, students are increasingly distracted by digital devices during lessons, which affects their concentration and classroom engagement.What problems does this cause, and what solutions can be implemented to address them? Write at least 250 words.
In modern era, there is an increasing debate about digital devices in schools causes destructing by students which leads to off-focus and intrest in accademics....