This Band 5 IELTS essay addresses the debate on whether university students should pick their own subjects or focus on useful areas like science and technology. While it presents both views, the essay struggles with superficial arguments and a lack of coherent structure, limiting its overall effectiveness.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Discuss both views · University Students · 40 min
There are two opposing views on whether university students should be free to choose their own subjects or whether they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)
Summary: The essay meets the minimum word count of 262 words. It addresses both views and presents an opinion, but the discussion is underdeveloped with superficial arguments. There are issues with logical flow, vocabulary range, and grammatical accuracy, which limit the overall effectiveness.
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On one hand, university students choosing their own subjects might be beneficial for the students, whereas on the other hand, allowing only the subjects such as science and technology may be considered helpful for them in the future.
For some students, choosing their own subjects in university may be useful for them in the forseeable future. A student, when in school or college, is bound to study the subjects chose by the institute or government which even though us important for him but also put his prudent mind to a certain limit. Therefore, a student at the time of his university shall be allowed to choose his own subjects so that he can perform well in the domain he is interested in. For instance, a university student chooses Art as a subject and continues to study it and learing it in his university life, he might get good grades in it because his interest in it.
For other students, choosing their own subjects might be a difficult task. University students focusing on subjects offered by the institute have more potential in scoring good results because their focus is centered solely on those subjects. Science and technology related subjects or the ones similar to them may help the students to cope up with not just the present but also the future developments in the society.
In conclusion, my opinion is that students shall be allowed to choose their own subjects so that they are keen to learn them and in future are able to perform well in the field they are interested in.
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling · Grammar · Vocabulary · Criteria Analysis
Spelling Mistakes
2 errors| Misspelled Word | Corrected Word |
|---|---|
| forseeable | foreseeable |
| learing | learning |
Grammatical Mistakes
4 errors| Mistake | Correction | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| subjects chose | subjects chosen | Incorrect verb form; 'chosen' is the past participle required for passive voice. |
| us important | is important | Incorrect verb form; 'us' should be 'is' for subject-verb agreement. |
| a university student chooses Art as a subject and continues to study it and learing it in his university life, he might get good grades | a university student who chooses Art as a subject and continues to study and learn it during his university life might get good grades | Run-on sentence; corrected by using a relative clause to connect ideas properly. |
| cope up with | cope with | Incorrect phrasal verb; 'cope with' is the standard usage. |
Vocabulary Improvements
2 suggestions| Original Word/Phrase | Improved Word/Phrase | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| prudent mind | student's mind | Inaccurate word choice; 'prudent' is not suitable here; 'student's mind' is clearer and more appropriate. |
| put to a certain limit | limit his potential | Vague phrasing; 'limit his potential' is more precise and academic. |
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Detailed Criteria Feedback
AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion
Task Response
5.5
Evaluation
The essay partially addresses the task by discussing both views and giving an opinion. However, the arguments are not fully extended, and the second view is not clearly explained, leading to a superficial treatment of the topic.
Examples
For example, the paragraph on studying useful subjects like science and technology does not elaborate on why focusing solely on these subjects is beneficial; it only states that students might score well and cope with future developments without detailed support or examples.
How to Improve
To improve, provide more detailed explanations and specific examples for each view. Ensure that the opinion is supported with reasons and that both sides are equally developed with relevant evidence or illustrations.
Coherence and Cohesion
5
Evaluation
The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, but lacks clear progression between ideas. Cohesive devices are underused, and some paragraphs are not logically connected.
Examples
The introduction repeats the question without effective paraphrasing. The transition between paragraphs is abrupt, and the second body paragraph starts with 'For other students, choosing their own subjects might be a difficult task,' which does not directly relate to the opposing view about studying only useful subjects.
How to Improve
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas. Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that ideas flow smoothly from one to the next. Practice paraphrasing the question in the introduction.
Lexical Resource
5
Evaluation
Vocabulary is limited and repetitive, with some inaccuracies in word choice, spelling, and collocations.
Examples
Words like 'beneficial', 'useful', and 'helpful' are overused. Spelling errors: 'forseeable' (should be 'foreseeable'), 'learing' (should be 'learning'). Incorrect phrase: 'cope up with' (should be 'cope with'). Awkward usage: 'prudent mind'.
How to Improve
Expand vocabulary by learning and using synonyms. Practice spelling and use collocations correctly. Read more academic texts to see words in context and improve lexical range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
5
Evaluation
Grammatical structures are simple with frequent errors, affecting clarity and precision.
Examples
Error in verb tense: 'subjects chose' (should be 'subjects chosen'). Unclear sentence: 'which even though us important for him but also put his prudent mind to a certain limit.' Repetitive structure: 'he might get good grades in it because his interest in it.'
How to Improve
Practice complex sentence structures. Review grammar rules, especially verb forms, articles, and sentence construction. Proofread essays to correct errors and improve accuracy.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
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