This Band 6 IELTS essay discusses views on income limits. While it addresses both perspectives, there are coherence and clarity issues that need attention. Understanding these problems can help you enhance your writing and achieve a higher band score.
IELTS Writing Task 2 Question
Discuss both views · High Incomes · 40 min
Some people in different countries earn very high incomes. While some people think that this is beneficial for the nation, others believe that the government should limit how much money people can make. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Write at least 250 words.
Score Breakdown
IELTS Writing Band Scores (1–9)
Summary: The essay meets the minimum word count of 323 words (required: 250). It addresses the task by discussing both views and presenting a clear opinion, but the arguments are somewhat underdeveloped and lack depth. There are issues with vocabulary accuracy and grammatical errors that occasionally hinder clarity.
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Some individuals in different countries earn very high incomes. While some people think that this is beneficial for the nation, others believe that the government should limit how much money people can make. I think it is beneficial to the government for its citizens to earn high wages.
To start with, some people are of the opinion that the government should limit the money earned by working class members in the nation probably because they think that it is a means of saving money for the government to avoid much spending on its side. It also cause the individuals to live within their limits and avoid luxurious lifestyles. People learn to save and use money wisely avoiding wastage of money and food. With limited earnings, the citizens learn to work hard for extra incomes and this help curb slothfulness.
On the other hand, Not placing a band on peoples earnings is of many advantages for both the government and the subordinates.
Higher incomes improves quality of life in the country thereby reducing hardship and criminality. If the people earn much, the government gain more because, taxes would be more, the people would be happy and crime rate would reduce drastically. In such countries, the people are comfortable and are able to efficiently meet their personal needs, which helps to increase the life expectancy of the citizens in a nation. Moreover, the government are able to retain its national workforce because its members would not be looking for a greener pasture in other countries. Take Nigeria for an example, Nigeria is experiencing brain drain because the government has refused to aprove a reasonable renumeration for the workers.
In conclusion, despite any opinion different people can present, I believe that providing the workforce of a country with high renumeration is invaluable because it will help retain its workers and thereby improve the economy of the nation which is the most important feat
for any Nation.
AI Feedback Report Details
Spelling · Grammar · Vocabulary · Criteria Analysis
Spelling Mistakes
4 errors| Misspelled Word | Corrected Word |
|---|---|
| aprove | approve |
| renumeration | remuneration |
| band | ban |
| peoples | people's |
Grammatical Mistakes
8 errors| Mistake | Correction | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| It also cause | It also causes | Subject-verb agreement: 'it' is singular, so 'causes' |
| this help curb | this helps curb | Subject-verb agreement: 'this' is singular, so 'helps' |
| is of many advantages | has many advantages | Awkward phrasing; 'has many advantages' is standard |
| Higher incomes improves | Higher incomes improve | Subject-verb agreement: 'incomes' is plural, so 'improve' |
| the government gain more | the government gains more | Subject-verb agreement: 'government' is singular, so 'gains' |
| the government are able | the government is able | Subject-verb agreement: 'government' is singular, so 'is' |
| a greener pasture | greener pastures | Idiomatic expression typically used in plural |
| despite any opinion different people can present | despite any opinions that different people may present | Awkward phrasing; needs clarification for grammatical correctness |
Vocabulary Improvements
7 suggestions| Original Word/Phrase | Improved Word/Phrase | Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| working class members | workers | Vague; more precise term for individuals employed |
| avoid much spending on its side | reduce government expenditure | Informal and vague; more academic alternative |
| live within their limits | live within their means | Standard idiom for financial management |
| wastage of money and food | waste of money and food | 'Wastage' is less common; 'waste' is preferred |
| extra incomes | additional income | 'Income' is typically uncountable; 'additional income' is more appropriate |
| subordinates | citizens | 'Subordinates' implies hierarchical relationship; 'citizens' is more appropriate in this context |
| feat | goal | 'Feat' means achievement, but in this context, 'goal' is more suitable for importance to a nation |
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Detailed Criteria Feedback
AI-powered analysis for each scoring criterion
Task Response6
Evaluation
The essay covers both views and states the writer's opinion, fulfilling the task requirements. However, the development of ideas is limited, and the arguments for limiting incomes are not fully explored or logically supported.
Examples
For the view supporting income limits, the essay mentions saving government money and avoiding luxurious lifestyles without explaining how limits achieve this. The example of Nigeria in the second paragraph is relevant but briefly explained.
How to Improve
Expand on each view with more detailed reasoning, such as economic theories or social impacts. Provide specific examples and evidence to support claims, ensuring a balanced discussion before stating your opinion.
Coherence & Cohesion6
Evaluation
The essay has a clear overall structure with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, cohesion within paragraphs is inconsistent, and some transitions are abrupt, affecting the flow of ideas.
Examples
Phrases like 'To start with' and 'On the other hand' provide basic organization, but sentences within paragraphs lack smooth linking (e.g., 'It also cause...' followed by unrelated points). The conclusion restates the opinion but does not effectively summarize both views.
How to Improve
Use a wider range of cohesive devices (e.g., 'furthermore', 'in contrast') to connect ideas. Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that supporting sentences logically follow. Improve paragraph transitions to enhance flow.
Lexical Resource5.5
Evaluation
Vocabulary is adequate for the task but with noticeable inaccuracies in spelling and word choice. Some terms are misused or inappropriate, limiting precision and sophistication.
Examples
Misspellings like 'renumeration' (correct: 'remuneration'), 'band' (likely meaning 'cap' or 'limit'), and 'slothfulness' (uncommon; 'laziness' might be better). Idiomatic phrases like 'greener pasture' are used but slightly misapplied ('pastures' is typically plural).
How to Improve
Work on spelling and learn precise vocabulary related to economics and income distribution. Use a dictionary or thesaurus to confirm word meanings and avoid repetition. Practice using idioms correctly in context.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy5.5
Evaluation
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but grammatical errors are frequent, including subject-verb agreement, verb form errors, and article misuse, which sometimes obscure meaning.
Examples
Errors such as 'It also cause' (should be 'causes'), 'this help curb' (should be 'helps'), 'the government are able' (should be 'is able'), and 'aprove' (should be 'approve'). Inconsistent tense usage and missing articles also occur.
How to Improve
Focus on grammatical accuracy, particularly subject-verb agreement and verb tenses. Review article usage ('a' vs. 'the'). Practice constructing complex sentences with correct punctuation and subordinate clauses to improve range.
Tip: Review the Band 9 model answer to see how a high-scoring essay structures arguments, uses advanced vocabulary, and maintains coherence throughout.
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